Parenthood is difficult because kids do not come into your life with a ‘How to handle kids’ manual!
From the moment they take hold in the womb, they take over every sleeping and waking thought in your life. It is tough indeed because these little people have a mind of their own and will refuse to be puppets!
The Uncommon Box is delighted to share what our Uncommon writer Jessica Sahay has to say about her experiences of being a new mother. The words here stem from her own experiences and that is why it makes all the difference.
Confessions of a new mother
Me before the Baby!
There was a time when I used to look at my friends who were new moms with wonder at all the hullabaloo they used to create over their little one smiling or waving their hands and legs without any coordination or chuckling or cooing etc. This was the time in my life when my work took a front seat for me and I was busy managing my career through work struggles, politics and all that comes along with a woman making her mark at the work place.
“I used to think what is the big deal if your baby hasn’t pooped in a while or if the pee count is less than six ?”
And why does my friend breathe a sigh of relief and is overcome with joy when her baby does finally poop? C’mon…it’s only poop! Little did I know I would be doing the same things I used to admonish my friends for (in my head of course). I learnt early on that you DO NOT want to mess with new moms! They will smack you in the head if they want to, believe me.
A New Mother’s Reality Checks!
Throughout my pregnancy it never sank in me that I was going to be a MOM. I looked at it like another thing I was going through medically. Even when the baby kicked and squirmed like nobody’s business, although it felt good, it did not prepare me for the responsibility. Even during delivery (c-section) did I feel anything, nada! It was only when I heard her howl did I realise what was happening. All the emotions I read about or was told by my friends happened to me in one split second. When I held my little one for the first time I was overcome with such pure love for her that in that moment I became one of my “friends” and mentally apologised for everything I ever thought about them.
“Being a sales professional, I started comparing her pee and poop count to my daily targets.”
When she met her daily “targets” there was no one more overjoyed than me. Her feeding time needed to be as punctual as my daily appointments with my client. Her smiles were my rewards. Suddenly my life didn’t feel much different than it did when I was working.
What makes it worthwhile!
My daughter’s first smile felt like heaven. Her first laugh at me being making absolutely nonsensical faces and talking utter rubbish made me laugh. The first time she pouted or grinned or chuckled or cooed or did anything for that matter made me want to take pictures of her non-stop. I have blown up my phone with photographs and videos of my daughter. On a daily basis my phone call log had at least one call to her pediatrician because I just didn’t trust my mom and my mum-in-law enough when they said, “this is normal and it happens to babies.” Now I do want to add here that I am not a hyper-sensitive or an overbearing and over-protective mother. I just suddenly could not imagine anything ever happening to my little one.
Mummy Mode on!
I know what you are thinking. Is this the same person who once said “C’mon its only poop”? Well yeah, it is the same person with now a broader perspective of life and a much more tolerant view of people. Of course being a mother has its own challenges and frustrations but watching your baby laugh and smile at you makes the whole wanting-to-pull-your-hair-out feeling just disappear.
“To all the new mums, or to-be mums – don’t worry, just have a little patience and a little faith. It does get easier and it does get better and I speak from my own experience.”
We are sure there is enough substance in the write up you have just read that made you go like – ah, you too! The crux of the matter is that Life becomes a little easier when we share our experiences. That’s the secret of making everything seem bearable and possible.
About the author
Jessica is a 30-something new mother of a baby girl who in a previous life was a hardcore sales professional in hospitality. In her words, ‘After 9 workaholic years, I decided to take a break and enjoy motherhood.’ In her spare time (if she manages to take it out right now) she catches up on her reading, and admits that she likes to watch trashy and at times good TV shows and blog about my experiences as a mother.
You can find more of her blogs on the link given below:
www.anencounterwithlife.wordpress.com
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